Monday, November 16, 2009

Homework Assignment 6

This week we're going to give everyone's knees, backs, and beds a little break.   In addition, this will give those who need to go sign up for a yoga class a chance to find one.  Instead of drawing a card, we're going to talk dirty.

Oh yes, we're going there.

So, this week, find some time and try out some new vocabulary.  ;-)

Suggested reading:

mind of a man: how to talk dirty - this isn't so much of a how-to per se but it's really funny Sexuality, How to Talk Dirty - not a bad article

Urban Dictionary - should you need help finding appropriate slang terms, because seriously medical terminology has no place in bed unless you're a convalescent.

Some Fics with decent dirty talk (there are so many but these are what people have recommended and stuff that comes to my mind):

Dirty Talking Edward C2 on - I haven't read all of these but there are quite a few there.

The phone sex scene from TB&TC by The Black Arrow -  This one's pretty popular.  There's this exchange of power between the two at the very end of the conversation.  In addition, I think that only one foul word is uttered the entire time.

The Screamers by Kiya Raven - Okay, dirty talk in this fic ranges from funny to hot. 

Reality Minus Expectations by mjinaspen - Not what one would typically think of but thinking outside the box works too.

Emancipation Proclamation by kharizzmatic - Quoting poetry in a foreign language in bed totally counts.

Clipped Wings and Inked Armour by hunterhunting - Let's face it, it's mostly dirty talk.  Okay dirty talk, unresolved sexual tension, and heartfail ( ... these are a few of my favorite things ... )

Lambie - Seriously, you should know to just go pull up her profile.  One of my particular favorites is Landscapes, starting with the aptly titled chapter "Lemon."


  1. don't forget to try this over the phone if you get a chance... lots of fun and having a blue tooth makes it a lot easier by keeping your hands free for... um... manipulation... it doesn't hurt to have toys in the vacinity either. bonus points if you can call your partner at work and get them to play along at that time... lmao

  2. I've got a tough road ahead of me, The New Hubby is not a fan of the dirty talk. I kinda figured after oh, 6 years of having sex with him. I did forward the article from The Frisky (awesome site!) to maybe show that its totally normal to a) be uncomfortable with it to start and b) no, you will not sound like a porn star from the 70s.

  3. Oh... I feel an epic fail coming on...

  4. I love that on my own blog - I'm a win at dirty talk.....OK - that maybe because I ADORE dirty talk... seriously nothing gets me hotter than really dirty talk. My hubs is freakin' amazing at it! I could easily listen to him all damn day, well I'd have to hump him, but you get my point!


  5. Okay, I am not good at this at all. I was trying to get things lined up to do "jellyfish" and I used the words penis and vagina. It didn't go over very well, we fell over on the tile floor in the bathroom and he laughed.

    This assignment scares me more than anything of the others.

  6. Do you have something against using hot slang words, or do you just prefer medical terms? I don't think those words (penis, vagina, etc) are particularly a turn-on...but maybe Ben likes them? Or maybe you can ask him to talk dirty to you (or to tell you what he wants you to do to him)? That might work better. See where he goes with it and that might help you decide what you're comfortable with.

    *Good luck Angela! Can't wait to hear how things went! ;)

  7. I have always found it fascinating that DH is a quiet man during sex except for the occasional role playing where he's in charge... when I mentioned it he said it never occurred to him to say anything as he was just enjoying himself too much... weird... me? I'm a noisy bitch which he's always enjoyed... anyway, we did the homework assignment and he was really surprised how much I got turned on by his talking dirty to me during actual sex... this could possibly turn into a regular thing...